He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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