When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
