some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize
