Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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