If i come over, it means nothing
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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