you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
