Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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