Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
