I think i sorta joined a cult last night
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Randomize
