Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
