I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
