'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
