like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
