hotel room ftw
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I didn't notice because vodka
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
