lets start a swedish sibling band together
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
