So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize