im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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