Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
