Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Someone shattered a urinal.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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