Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
