I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
