So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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