He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
