i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
We are all done wearing pants today
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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