I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
