My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
