im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
