well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
