i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
