Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
