But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
My life is pants optional.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize