I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
