And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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