It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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