how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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