i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
