Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
