i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
