I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
