No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
