I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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