Someone shit on the floor
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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