a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize