new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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