careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
