Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
