ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Randomize
