I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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