At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
