just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
